There are so many times, when chatting with families or discussing what sleep training looks like and families immediately state, “Is my baby going to cry?’

My biggest question to them is… does your little one cry when you walk out of the room to the kitchen? Does your little one cry when you hand them over to dad why you shower? Does your little one cry while they’re in the carseat and no one can get to them?

Their answer is always, yes. At least at one of those scenarios. So, my answer to their, “will my baby cry during sleep training?” Is always, it depends on the baby. I cannot promise you that there will be no crying, and I cannot state that there will be level 10 crying. Babies cry.

Why do babies cry? BECAUSE CHANGE IS HAPPENING. And also, your little one is now realizing… wow, my mom can walk out of the room WITHOUT me. We are NOT the same person. Once again, CHANGE.

I suggest that the families that work with me sit back and go… Has there ever been a change that conjured up some feelings for them, themselves? Feelings of sadness or even happiness. That is what it is like for babies, especially if the new sleeping arrangements are a BIG change.

Two Important Preparations:

Room Preparation: Having the room prepared and set up to result in darkness meaning bedtime, sound machine for soothing and safe bedding for safety.
Appropriate Schedule: We cannot expect a 4 month old to go down for bed easily if they’ve not napped all day. They’re exhausted and unable to settle.
Two basic steps are ensuring that your child has a room environment created for sleep and a schedule that fits their needs. No matter what anything else looks like, please have these two preparations already in place!

FOUR STEPS TO ENDING TEARS WITH BEDTIME?

Secure Attachment: You need to focus on secure attachment with your children - hearing their wants, accepting their feelings and ensuring you are involved. This secure attachment helps with leaving at bedtime.
Boundary Setting (toddler and up): Let go of the fear of saying no. Be sure that your children are used to boundaries throughout the day, or trying to set a boundary of “staying in bed” will seem non-existent.
Intentional Bedtime: Before the bedtime routine begins spend a solid 10-15 minutes with just the two of you. FILL THEIR TANK during the bedtime routine and have affirmations that you say to them. “You are such a great kid & I love you for who you are.”
Starting Early: Implementing sleep habits early help’s with creating happy healthy sleepers who are have become accustomed to the sleep habits. You can even start with Newborns! This can be found in my newborn guide!